To the former ladies of 113 :)

"You're gonna look that woman in the eye and tell her.... how much... you hate her..."
I hate you all.
 aka
I love you all, through the Alps and Ukraine and Florida and Brazil and Washington all the way back to Provo.

Sail

Alysa this is for you!!! Or should I say Sister Davis...

When the dog bites, when the bee stings, when I'm feeling sad...

I simply remember my favorite things.  Let me begin:

My old roommies: Olivia, Brittany and Lindsey.  May they rest in peace.

My current roommies, whom I am very far away from: Alysa, Emily and random Brazilian girl number 1. 

Provo during Spring.

Hanging out at the drop of a hat when I'm bored. 

Bugging people by "criticizing" everything they like.  ;)

Laughing my head off at my friend's random antics.

Sunday night murder...

Speculating who's going to start dating.

Sneaking giant Dr. Peppers into the movie theater.

and so much more...

I miss me some Alta! 

Keep it real, and I'll see ya when I see ya!

The 7 Days of . . . Jimmer?

Emoney has already chronicled our failed attempts at getting people to prank us back when we engineer incredible, Oh-so fantastic pranks.

Current case in point: Jimmer

Not so many weeks ago, Alysa, by some small chance of fate, swiped a certain boy's keys. First thought that went through any of our minds when we found out was "PRANK WAR!"

Emily's Prank Idea #1: Let's steal their JIMMER poster!
Alysa: And then let's replace it with a Disney princess poster!

Done and done.

The prank went off beautifully. We weren't caught at all. Sneaky and sly. It was awesome.

We ran victoriously home, taped Jimmer up in our room and waited. And . . . waited. aannnnndddd waited.
Weeks later, they still hadn't pranked us back. All we got in recognition of our efforts was two measly nice notes addressed to Jimmer saying "I miss you. Come home soon." So, Alysa and I decided to take matters into our own hands. Alysa had the idea of a ransom note. I had the idea of having not just one item, but a ransom for every day of the week.

Hours and several cut-up magazines later, we taped a two-sided ransom note to the boys' apartment. Finally, ten minutes later, we [FINALLY] got a reaction.

Boy: "I can't read this . . ."
Alysa: "Well, you better try harder. Jimmer is on the line."

Apparently, they listened to that one.

Monday (before sunset):
[Knock on the door]
The door was opened to find . . . a CAN of pineapple. Not, as was demanded, "one pineapple", but canned pineapple several hours before the appointed time of sunset.
We told the boys they had to step it up.

Tuesday (after sunset):
[Knock on the door so loud that it scared Alysa to death]
The door was opened to find . . . a delicious edible green tropical nut pudding mix topped with oreos and filled with gummi worms. In other words: turf (the legal kind). (Because turf from Lavell Edwards Stadium would have been pushing the envelope.) (Just a little.)

Today is Wednesday. It's 6:00 p.m. exactly (only 2.5 hours more till sunset--if their ransom offerings actually ever show up on time) and I am not leaving the apartment until Day 3's ransom is received. It had better be good.

I can be your hero, baby...

Alysa Davis is in the house, and I thank all that's good and holy for that!  Because if she wasn't home, who would be here to help save me from the spiders that decided to infiltrate our living room?!

I have a general rule when it comes to spiders, it's kinda like a pact of sorts.  I tell them(sometimes out loud) that if they stay out of my reach and I don't see them move, then they can live.  BUT as soon as they start crawling across the ceiling or down the wall, I will shoot them!  Or, I'll scream bloody murder until Alysa comes to save the day. . .  Which is exactly what went down 20 minutes ago.

I was recounting my dream about spiders last night to Brittany, when all of a sudden she points to the corner of the room where there's an itty bitty spider. This doesn't truly concern me until I look up and see a slightly larger spider crawling across the ceiling, IN MY DIRECTION!  Oh hecks to the no.  I don't think so little spider...  So naturally Brit and I start freaking out, and that's when we spot another spider in another corner! Let's just say screaming and hyperventilation ensued...

Alysa then swooped in to save the day and crushed each of those spiders into oblivion.  She is truly my hero!

Taking the team to victory, and other inspiring stories.

The Real Alta inter-mural soccer team just rocked it big time at their Championship game tonight!  And the one and only Alysa Kick Butt Davis captained the team on to victory!

We were so proud of our wonderful roommate for making it into the championship, that we actually took the time to make her signs!  Three, in fact....

The signs so perfectly read, "We don't have the king, we don't have the pope, but we have the Altalopes!"  Yes you are reading that correctly, it's ALTAlopes!

These signs most miraculously brought the team on to victory as they scored the winning point during over time!  Excitement and joy was had by all.

The lucky signs now hang lovingly on our living room wall, reminding us to never take a day for granted.  To shoot for the stars, because even if we miss, at least well, there we are.  And lastly, that if we build a man a fire we warm him for a night, but if we set a man on fire we can warm him for a lifetime.  Such inspiration...

 Real Alta aka, "The Altalopes"  

pink pajamas, penguins on the bottom!

This blog is great... except there are hardly any pictures of me. So its time to fix this. Also, there are no pictures of Em, which I guess also is too bad... so we'll include her too. 
PLUS-- Who doesn't wanna hear about one of the greatest adventures of 113? The story goes like this:

There were once six animals. A leopard, an elephant, a flamingo, a baboon, a zebra, and a lion. Although- instinctually- some of these animals were natural enemies, there was a strong friendship betwixt the six. 


It was one fantastic evening the foe-turned-friends came together for a celebration. United in their love for animation, music, and humor; the animals primped their manes and slicked their fur to prepare for their honoring of... the Lion King!


All gleaming and exquisite, the animals ran together, to the great Wynnsong Savannah. Other animals watched them pass, and they regarded them with curiosity for their friendship and admiration for their moxie. 


Around the great pop-nafaka tree, under the canopy of the night sky, they sung and danced for the Lion King. The curious mixture of their animal calls burst across the Savannah as they sang their song:

Nants ingonyama bagithi Baba  
Sithi uhm ingonyama           

Nants ingonyama bagithi baba
Sithi uhhmm ingonyama
Ingonyama

Siyo Nqoba                    
Ingonyama
Ingonyama nengw' enamabala 

The jubilee lasted till late in the night, until the great sun rose over the golden plains of the Wynnsong. In tired but happy spirits, the animals returned to their dwelling, called Mia moa kumi na tatu.

Days passed, and life wore on for each animal. The neverending search for food and a mate sometimes wore them and their friendship down. But each animal will always remember the starlit night and how they celebrated the Lion King, with perfect friendship. 

Mwisho.

Okay, so I'm not a very good story writer. But its true, and that is really how it happened! 

Here are some pictures, as proof:

  Oh, those are some fine looking animals. Why they all don't have eternal mates yet is beyond any living creature, but you don't just wanna pick whatever will shout a mating call your way. No, only the very best of the Savannah for these ladies. Nawapenda marafiki zangu!

Life here at BYU is full of joy, laughter, sorrow, triumphs and of course random videos that you end up taking on your camera... I was just taking inventory of some of the things that I have on my computer, and happened to come across many of those lovely memories captured on tape. It is now my privilege to compile some of those random videos here, to share with all the world...

Me, Lindz and Matt were at a bonfire in the canyon, and for some reason decided that Matt should try to catch Lindz...

Since Matt wasn't actually trying to catch Lindz, I decided to show off some of my more manly qualities and catch her myself.  It worked perfectly! Until I slipped in the snow...

And of course, what would life at BYU be like if we didn't have a sneaky proposal video or two?

The classic. Singing Adele while someone's trying to talk on the phone, video.

Now this one's quite interesting, and potentially embarrassing... but since when do I care what other people think!?  Here's a little background:  I think it's funny to sing Who Says by Selena Gomez while pretending to cry.  So, when all of my roommates left for the weekend and I was the only one home, I thought it would be funny to record this video and send it to them.  

How about one of our inter-mural inter-tube water polo team being beat?  Now who wouldn't want a video of that?!  

And last but certainly not least by any means, is the themed birthday party video.  This one is very close to my heart because it involves punching "things..."  :)  

There are many more videos full of strange and random things that might possibly be found on this blog sometime in the future.  For now, we are letting them ripen like fine French wine...So until then, mon cherie!  

I'm gonna name that title that!

Aha, I see my initial blog about (BYU) drunken-ness has snowballed into a drunken relay of posts from my competitors! Er, roommates... 


Anyway, I have two reasons to write this blog:


1. to specify that Emily was not directly quoting Nate or I in her post about our debate. Although she might as well have been directly quoting Nate because he really didn't say anything noteworthy and refused to listen to any of my arguments, which were actually very good. 


2. to debunk the myth that I celebrate the upcoming London 2012 Olympics by debating about civil rights and bone density. 
I celebrate by counting down the days till the opening ceremony, watching YouTube clips of different Olympic events, reading articles on Yahoo about athletes, and dreaming about how one day I'm gonna win a gold medal and telling anyone who will listen how excited I am!! 
Which is very excited. Only 119 days till the most awesome two weeks ever! Eeeee!


(Okay, three reasons)
3. To write down what E-money said the other day that was Hi-larious: 
*knock, knock, knock*
"Wha- wha- whaaaat!!! Who is that?!"


Hahaha. Here are some other good alternatives to the phrase "Come in!":
(Anytime we thinks it Nate) "Go away!!" or "What do you wannnnt?"
(If I'm in the room) "Intrude!"
(If its dark and Oliva and Brittany just finished watched the Walking Dead) "AAAAAAA!"

It's a secret mission, in uncharted space

Guess who's going on a mission...?  This girl!  haha, just kidding... BUT there is someone by the name of Emily who is going on a mission.  


Emily "the savage" Russavage has been called to serve in the Ukraine, Kyiv mission!  


So Em, it's time to start packing your bags and stocking up on the thermal undies, cause baby, it's cold outside...


But of course before you leave we want you to be as fully prepared as possible, so here are some random facts about the Ukraine:

• The Ukrainian national anthem consists of only six lines (four in a verse and two in a chorus). The remaining verses of the anthem are considered politically incorrect. (“We’ll stand, brothers, in bloody battle, from the Syan to the Don” implies a claim to the territories of Russia and Poland). 
• One of the most famous Christmas songs “Schedrik” (a folk song written by a Ukrainian composer, Mykola Leontovich) is known to the rest of the world as “Carol of the Bells” or “Ring Christmas Bells”.
• At the moment of the declaration of independence, Ukraine was inhabited by 19.4 million pigs, today there are only 8.3 million. Despite its reputation of a major bacon eater, an average Ukrainian eats only 18 kg of pork a year. This is three times less than a typical German eats.
• The third most visited McDonald’s in the world is located in Kiev, near the train station. This restaurant has always been in the top five most crowded McDonald’s in the world. Last year, it served 2.283.399 visitors. 
• George Gershwin wrote one of the world’s most famous songs, “Summertime”, after being inspired by an old Ukrainian lullaby called “Sleep Is Tiptoeing About” performed by the Ukrainian National Chorus.

Good luck, Em!  You'll be a fantastic missionary.

Just remember, довго жити і процвітати!  

Well, tickle me pink and call me Krishna…

Happy belated Holi everyone!  Or, for those of you who are extremely American, Happy Festival of Colors! 

Saturday was a lovely spring day, with the smell of flowers and brightly colored powders in the air.  That’s normal for spring, right?  The smell of powders in the air…?

Well, maybe not where you’re from, but in Utah it sure is!

Olivia, Olivia’s sister, Matt, Nate and I all took the long pilgrimage to the Hare Krishna temple in Spanish Fork.  Hundreds of others followed suit as we all dreamed of throwing powder in each other’s faces to celebrate love, equality, Krishna, and of course spring. 

    

BUT

It’s all fun and games, until someone throws blue powder in your mouth.   Not that I would know or anything…

Despite the taste of aroma therapy chalk dust, and the fact that you can’t breathe because you’re afraid someone’s going to throw powder in your face right at that exact moment, it was an experience to remember.  Moshing students, body surfing, live Krishna dub step music … Everything you expect when you think of a Hindu spring festival.

All in all it was a day full of fun and Holi miracles! 

And the dish ran away with the spoon. Oh wait, the spoon was taped to the ceiling...

As everyone knows, we are the most utterly hilarious and prank worthy apartment that has ever existed.  Since last semester we've participated in some pretty good pranks!  Let me tell you of our very first prank here in (dramatic pause), The Alta Complex...

First of all, we began by starting the most fantastic prank war with our home evening brothers last semester. 

It was after our first home evening with the boys.  We went back to our apartment and came up with a genius idea.  Our plan was to infiltrate their apartment and tape all of their silverware to the ceiling!  We knew the boys were all leaving to go grocery shopping because by providence they announced it before we left their apartment…

A hoedy ho! 

Me being sneaking, and getting the tape ready...

However, we knew we still had to lure one last “brother” out.  So, we used Olivia’s awkward conversation skills (it’s her gift of the spirit) to keep him busy outside.

It was a success!  We ran our way up the stairs and into their unlocked apartment.  We found their silverware drawer and began taping like mad women!  UNTIL… we were caught in the act by one of our more inconspicuous “brothers.”  He was, unknown to us, back in his bedroom when we broke into the apartment and indiscreetly began our rush to prank.  He quietly walked into the living room, and politely asked us if he could help with anything.  After screaming bloody murder, we shakily replied no and proceeded to thank him for his hospitality…

Our prank was then complete.  We may have been caught, but what really mattered was that there was no doubt that the boys loved having to peel their silverware off the ceiling before they could eat…

--------

The ironic thing is, the silverware we ended up using was actually owned by the “brother” that so kindly asked if we needed help.  Oops, sorry Matt!  

Battle: Nate vs. Alysa

What does our apartment do Tuesday nights? Well, here's a little snapshot into the lives of 113:
Nate shows up with his cute little knock and comes in wearing his White Elephant otter shirt. We somehow related this to attending ghetto high schools (don't ask for that connection, I didn't even really follow it). Alysa then sallies forth with a report on her high school varsity swim team, and suddenly this invoked a battle to the death, over, (and no, I'm not joking), why don't black people like to swim. Now, remember, this is a debate between two white people about black people.

Nate: Black people don't swim because they weren't made for it.
Alysa: Black people don't swim because they were culturally repressed.
Nate: Black people have a higher bone density, and heavier muscles, so they sink more in the pool.
Alysa: Black people weren't allowed in white people's pools for a really long time.
Nate: Didn't you see the black guy in Michael Phelp's relay in the Olympics that almost cost them the victory? It's because he was so slow.
Alysa: But, in spite of his "bone density", there is a black guy on the US Olympic swim team.
Nate: He was on there. But, he is still?

[Nate and Alysa watch the relay in question and both celebrate the American's win and forget about the argument]

[Groaning, yelling, and celebrating all come to pass]

Thank goodness for Youtube for helping us relive the past.

***You don't know how many Olympic videos we watch in our apartment***

Oh wait. They are arguing again. (Apparently the Olympics can't even settle this one.)

Nate: Well, now that you have done the research, you can clearly see that it is all about bone density.
Alysa: Did you not listen to all the stuff I just read!!!
Nate: Okay, it's 99% bone density and 1% culture.
Alysa: No it's NOT! Listen to this "Swimming never became a part of African American recreational culture"
Nate: I'm talking about swimming in general.
Alysa: Well, I'm talking about swimming as a sport.
Nate: Ha Ha. I win.
Alysa: No you don't!
Nate: Yes I do.

[This is never going to get solved]

121 Days until the Olympics.
Yes, we are excited.

Fun, laughter and DEATH....

Can I get a "wha wha"?!  The Hunger Games movie was finally released last night, and where do you think these District 6 ladies were?  That's right, the midnight premiere!  Shoving our faces with popcorn and Dr. Pepper. Oh, and pizza and gummies and bread sticks.  Ya know, the normal movie items...

The Hunger Games was fantastic, and of course we stayed awake until 4am analyzing every little detail!

Here are some pictures documenting our night of fun and adventure:

Random girl on the left jumped in our picture.  Don't worry, we killed her after that...

"What are you, stupid?  Red eye flashes twice!"

Sorry ladies, I had to include this one!

Me hungry... for The Hunger Games!  

It was a fantastic night/morning filled with laughter, tears and oh so much fun!

Good luck at The Hunger Games, and may the odds be ever in your favor...

It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood!

It's a beautiful day in this neighborhood, fo sho!  Or more like a beautiful week.   So, to celebrate our lovely luck with mother nature, we've been galavanting and cavorting about in the great outdoors.  

We pranced amongst the cave people...

We stared at basketball playing boys from across the parking lot....

And of course we developed our talents that are sure to take us far in life....

Well, everyone except me, because the best I could draw was an asteroid with a "tree" on it...

Which everyone promptly turned in to a wanna be Super Saiyan.

Whats the first thing everyone thinks of when they think of college? That's right, drinking! 

Here at alta, our drinking personalities vary widely:

Brittany is very selfish about her beer. 

Red wine, Emily's favorite. It makes her feel so fine. 

It brings them together. 

I will happily admit that I am the moocher who takes sips of everyone else's drinks... until I'm drunk. 

                             With love,

                                                                the neighborhood drunkards